The Neighbors know my name

 

I don't know if it was me yelling every syllable in the phrase "what's-my-mo-tha-fuc-kin-name?!" or AK 47 answering.  But apparently we are too loud when ahem making love. We were loud enough to get a letter from AK's Canadian neighbor.  The interesting thing is that I've gotten a letter from my neighbors before in Korean.  My, then Korean girl friend was embarrassed because they literally told us to get a room. How the fuck are you gonna tell me I can't fuck my (ex) girlfriend in my own house? Yet this time I felt some kind of way. I wasn't embarrassed for being heard having sex, I was ashamed because I normally like to be considerate of other people’s feelings. Then I remembered meeting her boyfriend on the elevator.

  AK 47 and I met her live in boyfriend on the elevator. Although I've known of his existence since November I've recently met the guy a month ago.  Somehow he knew my name and I promptly asked "yo, man...um...ahem...do you hear anything?" He replied with an honest "no, not at all."  So AK 47 and I continued on with our wild monkey love.  Not that my dear readers wanna know this but AK and I have been having a lot of make-up sex....so yeah we can be a little loud and unruly(I didn't know I hate you could be filled with such ecstasy!).  Then last Saturday we got a note.  The note went like this and remember as a guy I'm summarizing it because it was too detailed:

1. We have to turn up my music at uncomfortable levels.

2. We have to eat dinner with earplugs in.

3. You guys we're having sex at 6:30 in the morning which woke us up twice.

  The first two complaints were obviously from the woman.  The third one is more than likely the boyfriend’s only complaint. This made me think, men and women see the act of sex differently. For example, whenever I've lived next to a single guy they never complain about sex noises. In fact they comment about it the next time they see you. That's the way guys operate. Imagine this: Who would be more offended by sex in public guys or women? We have to take into consideration religious affiliation but nobody follows their religion entirely. Women are always the one to be offended. Who is more likely to rush and put on their clothes when somebody walks in on them having sex? Well, if you're cheating that's a different story completely.  There is possibly something within the female psyche that detests the sound of love making and/or sex in nontraditional places. (Please give me your theories, no seriously I wanna know!)

  But let us return to the boyfriend. I've noticed that men don't normally complain unless said love making hinders their ability to sleep or shit. Because honestly we can piss anywhere. This could explain why most people have sex in the mens bathroom.  I've been in the bathroom while people were having sex and every guy that entered was like "Good for him!"  I've also have had friend who needed to wake up early the next day and will confront you like "hurry that shit up!" Look, I value the girlfriend’s complaints but in my horny opinion when people have sex you are bound to hear it but you shouldn't hear it when you are trying to get a project done or when trying to get sleep.

  AK 47 and I have a theory of how the whole ordeal went down.  The chick probably wanted to write the letter a long time ago but the boyfriend was like come on chill.  It's sex get over it. Then when we woke his ass up at 6:30 twice on a Saturday morning he was probably like "babe right that fucking letter!"